Matty Mullins – No Real Surprise

CCM: You’ve been very outspoken over the years about depression and anxiety, and I know mental health issues are discussed a lot in the rock music scene. Has this part of your story shown up in your Christian songwriting?
MM: Yes. “Until I Need You” is actually about a season of depression and anxiety I went through. It was so awful. It hit me out of nowhere, and I didn’t know why or how it was happening. I thought I was losing my mind.

The whole time I was like, “God, I know you have the power to take these feelings away. Why are you letting me feel like this?” But two years later, when I’ve come out on the other side, I see God was walking through it with me every step of the way. Now I have opportunities to impact, inspire, and offer hope to hundreds, thousands of people struggling with anxiety and depression. I want them to know you are not alone, and you don’t have to be scared. Just understand the human body is imperfect, and we have these things that happen to us. You shouldn’t be ashamed of it.

A lot of times the most helpful thing is to admit it’s happening, talk about it, and realize other people are struggling. That’s the most painful part: being inside your own head and feeling like you’re so alone. But when you find out other people struggle with the same thing, you start to heal. It’s amazing to see God’s plan unfold when you feel like your life is in utter chaos, and later you look back and see that he had everything lined up perfectly.

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